So I'm happy (and sad) to announce that I am leaving this blog. It just feels time.
I'm ready for something new. Change of scenery.
I'm still blogging though...very much so actually.
And I have some really exciting thoughts moving through my brain. So please, if you'd like to continue to following me just cross over the pond to my new blog.
I love looking back at old blogs and seeing the quirky, odd, questionable and without-a-doubt moments of Heavenly inspiration.
And even if you never follow my blog again...I encourage you to just LIVE this best life. Breath in the Fullness of God's goodness and love. Ohhh, He is so good.
Perfect Morning
Friday, June 29, 2012
Friday, June 8, 2012
FIRE
Fire is on the brain. Probably because I just spent the last 48 hours reporting on a fire here in Fort Collins.
AND last week, there was another fire that I was at. These super smart scientists took us on a tour of the burn area.
Now this fire was huge! 8,000 acres huge.
As we were walking along the trail, I started noticing the oddest thing.
You'd look to your left and all the land would look black and charcoal-y where the fire had come through. and then I'd look to my right and it would be like green pastures.
Look to the left: Black. Look to the right: green.
Now, I'm not a fire expert. (although I did get to put on a pair of nomex the other day), so this may be a regular for fires.
But it seemed to me as if this fire had a mind of its own. Like it went wherever it wanted. Moved wherever it wanted. I talked to one of the firefighters and he said, "It is like the fire made a mosaic. It just burned where it wanted to."
Hebrews 12:29
"For our God is an all-consuming Fire."
Deuteronomy 4:24
"For our God is an all consuming Fire, even a jealous God."
Psalm 50:3
"Our God comes, and will not be silent; a fire devours before Him..."
Exodus 19:18
"Mount Sinai was covered in smoke because the Lord descended on it in Fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace and the whole mountain trembled violently."
Psalm 97:1
Fire goes before Him, And burns up His adversaries round about. His lightnings lit up the world; The earth saw and trembled. The mountains melted like wax at the presence of the LORD, At the presence of the Lord of the whole earth. The heavens declare His righteousness, And all the peoples have seen His glory.
We always ask for the FIRE of God. And what we are asking for is the very nature of God. Jesus does not hide himself from us. So then why does it feel like sometimes we are missing it? ya know? have you ever felt like that? As if you are just missing it. or you just need a little more FIRE.
But here's the thing, is it really a question of lack or is a question of movment?
Are you moving with the Fire of God?
He goes where He wants. and half the time....more than half the time it doesn't make sense.
But to be consumed by an ALL CONSUMING FIRE, you have to be okay with being a part of the mosaic.
His ways are higher.
I'm all for asking for the Fire of God. There's not a whole lot more I love than that. It is also important though to ask for the desire and obedience to move with Him. It is often easy to receive, but not so easy to respond.
Move with the Fire. Make a Mosaic with Jesus.
and just in case you were worried about the fire last week...............
Stuart Fire Evacuees: Stuart Hole Fire Evacuees can sleep a little more peacefully tonight knowing the fire is almost half contained.
AND last week, there was another fire that I was at. These super smart scientists took us on a tour of the burn area.
Now this fire was huge! 8,000 acres huge.
As we were walking along the trail, I started noticing the oddest thing.
You'd look to your left and all the land would look black and charcoal-y where the fire had come through. and then I'd look to my right and it would be like green pastures.
Look to the left: Black. Look to the right: green.
Now, I'm not a fire expert. (although I did get to put on a pair of nomex the other day), so this may be a regular for fires.
But it seemed to me as if this fire had a mind of its own. Like it went wherever it wanted. Moved wherever it wanted. I talked to one of the firefighters and he said, "It is like the fire made a mosaic. It just burned where it wanted to."
Hebrews 12:29
"For our God is an all-consuming Fire."
Deuteronomy 4:24
"For our God is an all consuming Fire, even a jealous God."
Psalm 50:3
"Our God comes, and will not be silent; a fire devours before Him..."
Exodus 19:18
"Mount Sinai was covered in smoke because the Lord descended on it in Fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace and the whole mountain trembled violently."
Psalm 97:1
Fire goes before Him, And burns up His adversaries round about. His lightnings lit up the world; The earth saw and trembled. The mountains melted like wax at the presence of the LORD, At the presence of the Lord of the whole earth. The heavens declare His righteousness, And all the peoples have seen His glory.
We always ask for the FIRE of God. And what we are asking for is the very nature of God. Jesus does not hide himself from us. So then why does it feel like sometimes we are missing it? ya know? have you ever felt like that? As if you are just missing it. or you just need a little more FIRE.
But here's the thing, is it really a question of lack or is a question of movment?
Are you moving with the Fire of God?
He goes where He wants. and half the time....more than half the time it doesn't make sense.
But to be consumed by an ALL CONSUMING FIRE, you have to be okay with being a part of the mosaic.
His ways are higher.
I'm all for asking for the Fire of God. There's not a whole lot more I love than that. It is also important though to ask for the desire and obedience to move with Him. It is often easy to receive, but not so easy to respond.
Move with the Fire. Make a Mosaic with Jesus.
and just in case you were worried about the fire last week...............
Stuart Fire Evacuees: Stuart Hole Fire Evacuees can sleep a little more peacefully tonight knowing the fire is almost half contained.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Knight in Shining Armor
Psalm 18
I love you, God— you make me strong.
God is bedrock under my feet,
the castle in which I live,
my rescuing knight.
My God—the high crag
where I run for dear life,
hiding behind the boulders,
safe in the granite hideout.
I sing to God, the Praise-Lofty,
and find myself safe and saved.
4-5 The hangman's noose was tight at my throat;
devil waters rushed over me.
Hell's ropes cinched me tight;
death traps barred every exit.
6 A hostile world! I call to God,
I cry to God to help me.
From his palace he hears my call;
my cry brings me right into his presence—
a private audience!
Feast on that!
Man, did I need to hear that today...and everyday.
I always knew Jesus was a knight in shining armor. Now I can say it legally. It is right there in the Psalms. Ahh, Jesus--Knight in Shining Armor.
I love the last part. "My cry brings me right into his presence."
I'm really starting to learn that I have so much to learn. AND that I don't always have to have it all together. It is ok if I mess up. Or say something wrong. Or hit the snooze button one too many times.
He hears my call. He knows me.
The other day I repented for feeling like I always have to control the situation around me. And I sweetly heard the Lord say, "I know you. You are heard and seen by your Father in Heaven." I'll never forget when He said that to me. It was like a cabinet opened in my heart and a release of relief swept through my whole body. I AM SEEN! I AM SEEN! I AM SEEN! like me. alex ruiz. I am seen by Heaven.
and so are you.
OH, to be known. That is why we are alive. To be seen and heard by our Daddy.
The circumstances around you are not obstacles that you keep you from God. They actually escort you straight into His Presence. Step in.
Monday, May 21, 2012
Do --------> Hear
I've been practicing obedience.
That's a kind of weird statement. But I really have. I've purposely and intentionally been inviting the Lord in on daily no brainers and as He speaks about them I respond. or TRY to. I've been finding myself falling forward.
I really believe that obedience is the key to breakthrough.
The definition of obedience is: the compliance with someone's wishes or orders or acknowledgement of their authority.
Obedience is acknowledgement of authority.
Then he took the book of the covenant and read it in the hearing of the people; and they said, “All that the LORD has spoken we will do, and we will be obedient.” Exodus 24:7 NASB
In the hebrew, the part that says "we will do, and we will be obedient" is translated as "we will do and we will hear." But that seems a bit odd. How are we able to do before we hear?
Obedience to me looks a little something like this---->
Dad: alex, go wash your car.
Alex: ***thought life*** i'm busy hot glueing yarn to the wall. It is of upmost importantance that this craft gets done NOW. Who knows when anthropologie (the store) is going to come over for dinner. I want them to see my creativity.
Well you see dad, maybe later. (i know a store can't actually come to my house for dinner...but a girl can dream).
Dad: no, how about now.
Alex: why?
Dad: I said so.
Alex: it might rain
Dad: we are in a drought
Alex: I just prayed for rain
Dad: Go
Alex: maybe anthropologie will want to ride around in my car.
RIGHT?! am I alone? does this not happen everyday of your life??
See, we understand obedience as hearing a command/instruction then deciphering through OUR understanding if it is relevant and THEN choosing if/when/how/what time/how fast to respond.
But obedience is not an ACTION. It is a heart posture toward authority in your life. meaning, before Jesus tells me to give that necklace away I have already determined in my heart the answer is YES. Ok. Done. The hearing is secondary. The doing is primary.
So how do you get there?
Practice obedience. Taste and see that the Lord is good.
For example...yesterday the Lord helped me clean out my closet. Kinda.
It went like this
Jesus: do you need that sweater?
Alex: yeah, most likely.
Jesus: you have the same color sweater
Alex: no they are different. One is harvest mustard. the other is more of a dijon.
Jesus: yeah, i see what you're saying. do you need both of them?
Alex: you never know what the day will hold
Jesus: what does that even mean?
Alex: i have no idea. I like them both though and i also like options.
Jesus: pick one.
Alex: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Jesus: ........
Alex: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH let's read a book together instead. i know a really good book. I also know the author...............
Falling forward
Here's the thing...that example is not super serious, but at the same time has revealed a place in my heart where I don't completely trust. It may not make sense to me why I shouldn't have two sweaters with a mere drop of dye difference in color, but IT DOESN'T MATTER. I have submitted my life to THe One whose ways are far above mine.
You can not be obedient without trust. It is like Q and U. you can't separate them.
spend time with Jesus and ask him where your life lacks obedience. He'll show you. and the fruit of quick repentance and movement forward in obedience will be ABUNDANT breakthrough.
Rapid Obedience is the key to unlocking the blessing of God.
That's a kind of weird statement. But I really have. I've purposely and intentionally been inviting the Lord in on daily no brainers and as He speaks about them I respond. or TRY to. I've been finding myself falling forward.
I really believe that obedience is the key to breakthrough.
The definition of obedience is: the compliance with someone's wishes or orders or acknowledgement of their authority.
Obedience is acknowledgement of authority.
Then he took the book of the covenant and read it in the hearing of the people; and they said, “All that the LORD has spoken we will do, and we will be obedient.” Exodus 24:7 NASB
In the hebrew, the part that says "we will do, and we will be obedient" is translated as "we will do and we will hear." But that seems a bit odd. How are we able to do before we hear?
Obedience to me looks a little something like this---->
Dad: alex, go wash your car.
Alex: ***thought life*** i'm busy hot glueing yarn to the wall. It is of upmost importantance that this craft gets done NOW. Who knows when anthropologie (the store) is going to come over for dinner. I want them to see my creativity.
Well you see dad, maybe later. (i know a store can't actually come to my house for dinner...but a girl can dream).
Dad: no, how about now.
Alex: why?
Dad: I said so.
Alex: it might rain
Dad: we are in a drought
Alex: I just prayed for rain
Dad: Go
Alex: maybe anthropologie will want to ride around in my car.
RIGHT?! am I alone? does this not happen everyday of your life??
See, we understand obedience as hearing a command/instruction then deciphering through OUR understanding if it is relevant and THEN choosing if/when/how/what time/how fast to respond.
But obedience is not an ACTION. It is a heart posture toward authority in your life. meaning, before Jesus tells me to give that necklace away I have already determined in my heart the answer is YES. Ok. Done. The hearing is secondary. The doing is primary.
So how do you get there?
Practice obedience. Taste and see that the Lord is good.
For example...yesterday the Lord helped me clean out my closet. Kinda.
It went like this
Jesus: do you need that sweater?
Alex: yeah, most likely.
Jesus: you have the same color sweater
Alex: no they are different. One is harvest mustard. the other is more of a dijon.
Jesus: yeah, i see what you're saying. do you need both of them?
Alex: you never know what the day will hold
Jesus: what does that even mean?
Alex: i have no idea. I like them both though and i also like options.
Jesus: pick one.
Alex: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Jesus: ........
Alex: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH let's read a book together instead. i know a really good book. I also know the author...............
Falling forward
Here's the thing...that example is not super serious, but at the same time has revealed a place in my heart where I don't completely trust. It may not make sense to me why I shouldn't have two sweaters with a mere drop of dye difference in color, but IT DOESN'T MATTER. I have submitted my life to THe One whose ways are far above mine.
You can not be obedient without trust. It is like Q and U. you can't separate them.
spend time with Jesus and ask him where your life lacks obedience. He'll show you. and the fruit of quick repentance and movement forward in obedience will be ABUNDANT breakthrough.
Rapid Obedience is the key to unlocking the blessing of God.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Decisions/Decisions/Decisions
I have missed my precious blog. I really do love it & my 15 followers...truly.
I apologize if my thoughts are scattered. I just got back from Peru. I think the mixture of 24 hours of airport food, culture shock and OVERLOAD of starbucks has me all over the map.
I can't wait to share what I learned in Peru. But that is for another day (s). I'm still figuring out what city I am in.
On January 14 of this year, I asked Jesus this question. "Where do you want me when I graduate."
I then spent the next 30 days, asking the exact same question to Him and getting exactly different responses every day.
January 14
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: I want you to be where I can be closest to you. I don't want to be apart from you. I want to be as close to you as I can be. Which "option" do you think gets you there?
Looking back at Jesus' response, I just can't believe it. He said that to me?? Do you see/feel/taste/touch the weight of that statement. JESUS, creator of the world, the Beloved, the Most High, the Savior of the WORLD, the beginning and end, the Everlasting, the Lamb that was slain, the Prince of Peace...That man wants to get as close to me as He can.
January 19
Me: where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: Where do you do want to go when you graduate?
Me: I think I want to stay here.
Jesus: Why do you just think you want to stay here?
Me: cause is there really something for me to do up here? would it really be the best for me?
Anyone who has ever made a decision in their life knows the power of dilemma.
what shampoo do I buy? do I want my hair to be extremely voluminous? or salon soft? heaven forbid we combine the two....
What should I eat for dinner. Actually, this one is not tough for me. Whatever you do, always choose pizza. you'll never go wrong.
Do I buy this book or that one? Inside or outside? hot or cold? black or white? bike or drive? skirt or shorts? to be or not to be...we all know your decision, Hamlet.
up or down?
Stay in fort collins? Trust HIM?--even though I don't have any clue why I can feel the Father's heart saying STAY HERE. Every logical fiber of my being says WHY? where will you live? where will you find a job?
But I couldn't shake it. When you feel the heart beat of Heaven, stay there. Don't move. Camp out. Pitch a tent. Make a fire. Invite people over. Don't move until He does.
January 30
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: With Me.
Me: Well, where are you?
Jesus: I'm with you.
Me: Well, where am I supposed to be?
Jesus: with Me.
Me: Ok, I know that. But like you know...logistically speaking.
Jesus: I don't speak in logistics. I speak in terms of dreams. I see your dreams. I know the deepest groaning of your heart. and it makes me joyful to get you there. But I want to be with you. I want to do it together. as a team.
Me: Wow. we get to be on the same team?! That's pretty cool.
The place of dreaming is also the place of your permission.
Logic cannot cause you to inherit. You inherit through dreaming.
February 6
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: You know, my child. You know. You know where I'm asking you to stay.
So I stayed. In Fort Collins.
I was in. All in. I am in.
And I can tell you right now that I am absolutely living the dream.
About a month and a half later, I got a job offer in Fort Collins at the T.V. news station here. I get to spend another two years with the people that mean the most to me.
I love this city.
And most importantly, I get to step closer and closer into intimacy with Jesus.
Who knew...oh wait. He did.
Any decision. Big or small. step into what He is saying. It makes it SO much easier. I take that back. It doesn't make it easier. It makes it WORTH it. He is worth it.
I have pages of promises from the Father for this next season of my life.
Wherever you are at in life, whether you're deciding where to move or what brand of bread to buy--just DIVE into Heaven's rhythm. You'll be so thankful you did. Plus, you get to see Jesus working on your behalf. There is nothing like it.
February 7
Me: And then it hit me.
I decided to trust Jesus yesterday morning. I relinquished control of my future to HIm. I gave up something totally trusting that God will provide abundantly. That He has got me covered. Graham Cooke says, "If your head rules your heart, you'll be denied by your own caution. Joy, thanksgiving & rejoicing is the means by which you will both access and appropriate His nature and desire."
I don't know what is going to happen with everything. But I do trust Jesus. I don't know what this next year is going to look like. But I do trust Jesus. The Lord is my Shepherd. I shall not want.
May 20
Me: I love being on this cool team. Bring it on.
I apologize if my thoughts are scattered. I just got back from Peru. I think the mixture of 24 hours of airport food, culture shock and OVERLOAD of starbucks has me all over the map.
I can't wait to share what I learned in Peru. But that is for another day (s). I'm still figuring out what city I am in.
On January 14 of this year, I asked Jesus this question. "Where do you want me when I graduate."
I then spent the next 30 days, asking the exact same question to Him and getting exactly different responses every day.
January 14
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: I want you to be where I can be closest to you. I don't want to be apart from you. I want to be as close to you as I can be. Which "option" do you think gets you there?
Looking back at Jesus' response, I just can't believe it. He said that to me?? Do you see/feel/taste/touch the weight of that statement. JESUS, creator of the world, the Beloved, the Most High, the Savior of the WORLD, the beginning and end, the Everlasting, the Lamb that was slain, the Prince of Peace...That man wants to get as close to me as He can.
January 19
Me: where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: Where do you do want to go when you graduate?
Me: I think I want to stay here.
Jesus: Why do you just think you want to stay here?
Me: cause is there really something for me to do up here? would it really be the best for me?
Anyone who has ever made a decision in their life knows the power of dilemma.
what shampoo do I buy? do I want my hair to be extremely voluminous? or salon soft? heaven forbid we combine the two....
What should I eat for dinner. Actually, this one is not tough for me. Whatever you do, always choose pizza. you'll never go wrong.
Do I buy this book or that one? Inside or outside? hot or cold? black or white? bike or drive? skirt or shorts? to be or not to be...we all know your decision, Hamlet.
up or down?
Stay in fort collins? Trust HIM?--even though I don't have any clue why I can feel the Father's heart saying STAY HERE. Every logical fiber of my being says WHY? where will you live? where will you find a job?
But I couldn't shake it. When you feel the heart beat of Heaven, stay there. Don't move. Camp out. Pitch a tent. Make a fire. Invite people over. Don't move until He does.
January 30
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: With Me.
Me: Well, where are you?
Jesus: I'm with you.
Me: Well, where am I supposed to be?
Jesus: with Me.
Me: Ok, I know that. But like you know...logistically speaking.
Jesus: I don't speak in logistics. I speak in terms of dreams. I see your dreams. I know the deepest groaning of your heart. and it makes me joyful to get you there. But I want to be with you. I want to do it together. as a team.
Me: Wow. we get to be on the same team?! That's pretty cool.
The place of dreaming is also the place of your permission.
Logic cannot cause you to inherit. You inherit through dreaming.
February 6
Me: Where do you want me when I graduate?
Jesus: You know, my child. You know. You know where I'm asking you to stay.
So I stayed. In Fort Collins.
I was in. All in. I am in.
And I can tell you right now that I am absolutely living the dream.
About a month and a half later, I got a job offer in Fort Collins at the T.V. news station here. I get to spend another two years with the people that mean the most to me.
I love this city.
And most importantly, I get to step closer and closer into intimacy with Jesus.
Who knew...oh wait. He did.
Any decision. Big or small. step into what He is saying. It makes it SO much easier. I take that back. It doesn't make it easier. It makes it WORTH it. He is worth it.
I have pages of promises from the Father for this next season of my life.
Wherever you are at in life, whether you're deciding where to move or what brand of bread to buy--just DIVE into Heaven's rhythm. You'll be so thankful you did. Plus, you get to see Jesus working on your behalf. There is nothing like it.
February 7
Me: And then it hit me.
I decided to trust Jesus yesterday morning. I relinquished control of my future to HIm. I gave up something totally trusting that God will provide abundantly. That He has got me covered. Graham Cooke says, "If your head rules your heart, you'll be denied by your own caution. Joy, thanksgiving & rejoicing is the means by which you will both access and appropriate His nature and desire."
I don't know what is going to happen with everything. But I do trust Jesus. I don't know what this next year is going to look like. But I do trust Jesus. The Lord is my Shepherd. I shall not want.
May 20
Me: I love being on this cool team. Bring it on.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Declaration of Dependence
It has been some time since I have been on this little blog of mine.
I just have a quick thought and song to share with you.
I think everyday I wake up more aware of my dependence on Jesus. I feel terribly lost when I'm absent from His presence. Tonight, I realized that He and I haven't gotten much time together...And I can feel it. My heart feels like it is pacing, my words seem half jumbled, my clothes don't seem to match quite right, my time is oddly spent and my soul seems disconnected.
I never ever thought I would desperately desire connection with Jesus. Like, the feeling that if I didn't get to just touch Him, feel Him, hear Him...that I might just, well not be OK. I felt that tonight.
And it is one of the sweetest feelings ever. To desire Someone so bad that your heart actually aches. I couldn't wait to get home and get away with Him.
I feel like I am moving into an increased season of dependence. I don't know what to expect really in any area of my life. But, I do know the One who is faithful to the end. And because of that I choose to not live independent of Him, but dependent on Him. I come fully and completely alive with Him. I'd like to call this life of mine a Declaration of Dependence. (see what I did there) :) There is no better way to LIVE.
also, listen to this song. it is so real and raw. just will wreck you...in the best possible way ever.
I just have a quick thought and song to share with you.
I think everyday I wake up more aware of my dependence on Jesus. I feel terribly lost when I'm absent from His presence. Tonight, I realized that He and I haven't gotten much time together...And I can feel it. My heart feels like it is pacing, my words seem half jumbled, my clothes don't seem to match quite right, my time is oddly spent and my soul seems disconnected.
I never ever thought I would desperately desire connection with Jesus. Like, the feeling that if I didn't get to just touch Him, feel Him, hear Him...that I might just, well not be OK. I felt that tonight.
And it is one of the sweetest feelings ever. To desire Someone so bad that your heart actually aches. I couldn't wait to get home and get away with Him.
I feel like I am moving into an increased season of dependence. I don't know what to expect really in any area of my life. But, I do know the One who is faithful to the end. And because of that I choose to not live independent of Him, but dependent on Him. I come fully and completely alive with Him. I'd like to call this life of mine a Declaration of Dependence. (see what I did there) :) There is no better way to LIVE.
also, listen to this song. it is so real and raw. just will wreck you...in the best possible way ever.
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Decorate II
Vibrant & Bold Color is on the brain tonight. I love the decorations below.
hope you feel inspired!
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